Hey guys....thank you for supporting me, my waking life has been really hard lately. I just want a stable life....im really lost. Sleep isn't stable, not enough money, l feel lost on my future. Im tired of doing so much alone for 8 years. It's hard not to give up sometimes when you struggle so much, and you're constantly stuck, feeling like a burnout.
I've been dealing with this for 8 years, im used to it, but it gets lonely, and tiresome, like everything i do to improve my life financially (and physically like sleep) isn't good enough. Working for $160 McDonald's paychecks, sleep issues, having to do 80% of things alone, and anything i dont i have to ask my parents for help still, like money.
Not to mention part of the sleep issues come from dealing with the neighbor's dog for the past couple of months or so, after leaving constant letters on their door to take better care of their dog to stop the barking in the morning since i need sleep for work and other things, and the association i've complained to many times won't do anything but tell them the same thing, cops won't do anything, animal control won't do anything, so I'm taking legal action. Time to find an attourney.
I'm NOT losing my job because of little sleep because of bad dog owners, and anxiety, stress, whatever the hell. It's really hard not to give up with a lot fighting me for years, I feel like I'm trapped in a cage, like a constant loop, I'm always stuck in. I feel stuck. I wish I made more money off my music and creative hard work, working from home, so I could sleep whenever i want, since a schedule is apparently hard for me...I don't know.
This post won't be around long, I have another one about Off the Wall's season finale coming out whenever the episode is finished being edited and I post it. It's a good thing I backlogged content because I'm exausted and have no energy to do much of anything right now. I'm really depressed, and it feels like life is going nowhere sometimes. Mostly because of the sleep issue, but financially in general. I hate life right now. That's all.
Sorry for the doom and gloom, I just feel exausted emotionally and physically dealing with all this, it's like everything constantly fights me. I'm sick of it. I want a better start in life. Most people are only seeing this in 2020/2021, I've dealt with it for years. It gets boring, tiresome, lonely, depressing. I wish I could make a living off making music. That's a pipe dream.